Dokar

Dokar
One mode of transportation

Monday, January 31, 2011

"Tetannga/Teman Kami Pernikahan"

For those of you English speakers ;) : "Our Neighbor /Friend's Wedding"

When our good friend's and neighbor's asked us to come take part in their wedding, we were more than happy to! We felt honored when we were invited to a ceremony that was more than 3 hours away and asked to come the day before to participate in all the family events! Usually most guests are invited to just the reception part, the ceremony is for family and very close friend's. So only a few made the trip to the town where the bride's family was from for the wedding itself. We borrowed the mission's van and followed their driver and car to Pekalongan. We also helped transport some of the extended family because they couldn't all fit in the rented car. We were also asked to wear green, the color their side of the family would be wearing at the reception! We were so honored!

We decided to rent traditional dress know as "kebaya" to wear to the wedding and reception, knowing they would all be wearing it and LOVE if we became Javanese for the day too! We even got Eden a little outfit tailored to fit her! If only that were the whole story though:) It ended up being a bit more complicated than it sounded or than we had thought.

First of all, there are some language barriers as you may remember.:) We know enough to communicate on a basic level, but the problem was I don't think they really thought to fill us in on it all, even though we had asked. AND we had never participated in anything like this before, so we had no idea what to expect!! We didn't know there was going to be a fancy ceremony and dinner on the night before, so we only had nice casual clothes, which weren't a problem, but we felt a little embarrassed. Then that went all night, so by the time we got to the hotel and went to bed, it was 12! Including Eden! The hotel we stayed at was a M (the dominant religion here) hotel and there was a mini mosque next to our room!

Then, the next morning, I was supposed to go early to go get my hair and make-up done with the girls. So I got up at 5 and went to their place where they were staying. I waited and they did my make-up last, but unfortunately, no hairstyling until after the ceremony!?! WHAT?! I was told to get up and go w/o make-up or hairdo, so that is what I did! I was dressed and ready to go straight to the wedding ceremony that started at 7 am and now only had a few minutes to do my hair in a strange place as well as help my husband with his outfit! I started to feel even more embarrassed as I thought "I have 10 pounds of make-up on, but bed hair!". Then I made the mistake of looking in the mirror, and I cringed! The make-up was plastered on, I thought I looked like a joke! I wanted so badly to hide, but sucked it up and put a smile on my face, feeling like a fool:)

We managed to pull ourselves together and go only to find everyone was wearing slacks and a batik shirts!!!! We had noo idea people dress down for the wedding part! As if we didn't stand out enough, we were just about the only ones wearing the kebaya besides a few women! Turns out the big-to-do is for the reception only? Still not positive I understand it all. So we ended up staying in that uncomfortable dress in the heat for over 8 HOURS!!!!! Because we couldn't change out of it until 1 pm. I have never been so happy to change and I can speak for J too, he was dying! His shoes were too small, his skirt was too tight and he had had enough:) My only regret though was not capturing him walking on video tape! He had to take tiny steps because we wrapped his sarung too tight! He was such a good sport though! The only reason he did it was to make our neighbors day. I was surprised, if you know my hubby, you know this was huge, monumental actually!

After the ceremony part, a lady pulled me into a house and sat me down to get my hair done w/ all the other ladies, I was excited to be experiencing all these cultural traditions, but wondering what I had gotten myself into...again! It was different, but I had the same hair as all the other ladies who didn't have their head coverings on.
Eden got hers done just in time to go take a break at the hotel..that was tricky to keep a 1 year old's up-do looking nice for a few hours!

The whole trip was a fun experience in which we learned a lot, but were exhausted by the time we got home the next night...2 very long days. Never before have I wished there was a reality tv camera crew following us until that last day! It would have been extremely entertaining watching the "white foreigners" trying so hard and J trying to get in and out of the van and limping by the end of the day, etc, etc, etc! Glad we did it and glad it's done...until the next time;)

Here are some pictures from the weekend:


Pak Sunarno and Adi (Our neighbors, father and son)
Adi is the one who got married.

Siraman, a Javanese ceremony where the family members use special water to "mandi" or bathe the bride and groom. I think the only reason for this is it is just a tradition they believe makes them more beautiful for the big day.



The bride the night before and Adi's sister, Febi.

Pre-Javanese makeover


After...anyone scared of clowns?

I find this picture very amusing!

Picture with the bride and groom, Adi and Angky.

Eden "gettin' her hur did"
After she sat and watched me get mine done, she wanted to get hers done too. All I can say is even if there were pics of the process of me getting my hair did, I am not sure I would put them up here!! I already have big, uncontrollable hair and then they teased my entire head of hair!

Javanese makeover complete. And yes I even have a black hairpiece attached to the back of my head

J was sad to return those shoes

2 of the wonderful ladies I met

Eden taking a little break at the hotel in between the ceremony and reception. It was very hot there and her clothes were uncomfortable and big on her, poor little thing ! The wedding ceremony was at 7 am and the reception wasn't until 11 am.


The whole family! We blend right in, don't we!

Eden was so exhausted by the time we left to go home, she asked for a chip in the car and fell asleep in the middle of eating it! Which if you know Eden, that's crazy!

This picture was taken a week later at the reception here in Salatiga. They had a reception at their house and it overflowed into ours:) We were happy to lend our porch and yard for chairs and guests.

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